Daddy's Little Boy

My dearest little man,

It's me, mommy. You don't know who I am yet, you only know the soft rocking of your constant warm little bath, my heartbeat, and maybe my wild laughter. And although I technically haven't met you yet either, I am really starting to know you pretty well. You like it when I lay on my right side, and when I kneel really awkwardly to say prayers. You always kick the most when I'm in those positions. You are a wild little one, just like your daddy. You kick me non stop and sometimes I really wonder what's going on in there. I know as soon as you can walk, you'll be crawling over things and jumping off of furniture way too high to be safe; again, just like your daddy.

Your dad and I always sit and wonder what you will be like, who you'll grow up to be, what your dreams will be. But something we already know and will always know is where you come from and what makes you you. I hope someday I can really, I mean really make you understand that you are the product of So. Much. Love. That two young kids sacrificed so much to bring you here, because we wanted to see your face, to meet you, to see what you might become, and to be allowed a brief moment to teach you a few things and mostly to have you teach us about love and about happiness. That two people will always stand behind you, hold your hand, throw everyone out of the way so you can pass, and cheer on the sidelines for you. That we wanted you, oh how we wanted you. That your place in the world will always be here, nestled between the two of us, safe and happy and loved.

I hope I help you see how much your father loves you. Some day when you are expecting your own little child, you will start to understand. Understand the excitement and pure joy that comes from anxiously awaiting the arrival of your own flesh and blood. Understand the sacrifices of a loving father; the long hours worked, the long nights of studying, the worry of the bills, the sheer exhaustion of life; all these sacrifices made because of the love he has for you, the little one he hasn't even met yet. Because he wants the very best for you, for your future. He worries about teaching you all the things of the world and the gospel, about life and about eternity. He loves you, a mind-blowing, heart bursting kind of love.

And so do I.

22 Weeks

This is per request of my mom. The belly has finally begun to grow at lightning speed. Two weeks ago you could barely tell I was pregnant. My tummy is getting so dry and I feel like I can actually feel it stretching every day! I feel our little guy bouncing around in there all the time. This whole baby thing is starting to feel more real this week because we bought our crib (thanks mom and dad!) and stroller/car seat. It feels strange having this empty crib in our house. We lay in bed at night staring at it, getting all excited to have a baby to put in there soon! We start our birthing classes on the 15th (hypnobirthing), so we'll see how that goes.

Happy Halloween and Merry Christmas

We have had such a fun week celebrating Halloween around here. Sunday night we put on Hocus Pocus in the background, ate sugar cookies until we thought we'd burst, and carved pumpkins. It was a fun night. Then on Monday we had a little Halloween party up in Salt Lake at Sarah's house with all of the family that lives around here. It was fun to get all dressed up. We all hid in different bedrooms with candy and the little girls came around and "trick or treated" to us each. What a fun night! So good to be with family and just have fun. Not to mention Sarah made some amazing chili and treats for us. Nothing better. But I woke up this morning to a car covered in snow, and I won't deny that I was blasting the Christmas music taking Gideon to school. I love the holidays and I am so excited that it's starting!

Jared and Lynn's pumpkins

Mine and Gideon's pumpkins

Sarah, Lynn, Hannah, Me and Kayla all dressed up

Gideon dressed up as Hiccup from HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON. He made the costume with everything from D.I! It turned out so great and the little girls loved it. I was a cat because, well, nothing else really fit.

Jungle Gym

Our little man is becoming quite the acrobat. I can feel him in there so often now! I swear he was doing somersaults tonight. And kicking on his way around. I think my bladder must be his biggest source of entertainment in there, because I'm pretty sure I had to get up and go tinkle about 5 times at church today. Literally. He must be having the time of this life bouncing up and down on that thing. But it's so worth it! I feel like I am getting to know him so much, just feeling him get stronger and more active (or just more cramped I suppose). I can't wait to meet him! His little face will never have enough kisses. I hope he's ready for this.

In other news, today was some major progress in this house. While I woke up nauseated and had to throw up a few times violently in the toilet, I felt better the rest of the day and made it through the full three hours of church!! That has only happened one other time since I've been pregnant. It was so nice. I really take for granted how spiritually refreshed I feel after attending all of my meetings. I was grateful for a good day of feeling good. And very grateful for a husband who does the dishes for me, offers to make me anything I want for breakfast, runs errands for me at the last minute, helps make sure we do our calling, rubs my feet, and is still willing to cook me a steak dinner at midnight when I get really hungry and too weak to cook anything myself. He is a real gem. I won't make him change too many diapers or get up too many times at night because he's practically been taking care of a baby this whole time!

Scripture Scouts!

Last night Gideon and I were reading in the Book of Mormon and he randomly decided to quiz me and see if I knew what the rameumptom was. I totally surprised him by busting out a song about that scripture story that I learned when I was like seven or eight. It's from Scripture Scouts, these cassette tapes my parents bought us and I would listen to them every night when I went to bed. We were laughing pretty hard as I sang the song. But after that I got totally excited about having a baby because now I have an excuse to buy the Scripture Scouts again! They really are a brilliant idea for kids to learn the stories from the scriptures. They have Book of Mormon, Old Testament, the Articles of Faith and the Family Proclamation. I LOVED these when I was a kid and I still remember the stories I learned from listening to them! I am buying these and our little boy will know them like the back of his hand. If you have little kids, you have to get these!!

We're Having A BOY! ! !

. . . and we couldn't be happier. He's the second little boy on my side of the family, and after 6 beautiful baby girls on my husbands side, the first grandson of the Medleys. We will probably constantly be changing out Barbies for G.I. Joes at family reuinons, and he might not get to be involved with the cousins all in the tub for too long, but he will surely be well rounded! Hopefully we can give him a brother soon or someone has a little boy cousin for him. Either way we are just so thrilled to have a gender for this little bun in the oven. I think the real joy is just knowing for sure now that he is healthy and doing great in there, all nestled in for the long journey ahead of both of us. It was so awesome to see him moving around like crazy on the ultrasound. I'm pretty sure I just fell in love, again. We are so excited to welcome this little baby boy into our home in just a few short months!

Sorry about the picture of a picture -- we don't have a scanner


19 1/2 weeks

Knock Knock

Monday I finally, finally, finally felt our little baby move. For sure. It's really unfair that you have about twice the amount of gas bubbles in your tummy at the same time you really want to notice any tiny squirm, throwing you off for a while. Well, since Monday, this little babe kicks up a storm mostly between 6 and 8 pm. I eat some dinner and lay on the couch, hands lightly on my belly. I admit; sometimes I talk high pitched and ask the little baby to move for mommy. Dumb, I know, but hey, I spend a lot of time alone at night. But it really is the beginning of all the motherly bonding everyone talks about. There's really no describing it. All the puking, the heart burn, the emotional breakdowns, all of the pregnancy discomfort boils away to nothing when you really feel that tiny person in there! I was watching my little 4 month old niece kick and wiggle this weekend, and I just pictured my little baby doing the same thing in there. Just much smaller (although, some of those kicks have been pretty hard! I think he/she's going to be a soccer player, just like his/her momma). Anyways, it's been awesome. Exciting to say the least. I can't wait for Gideon to be able to feel the movement. He is REALLY excited about it. And most exciting of all, we find out the gender MONDAY. Monday! That's about three days away. We are holding our breath. If you want credit for predicting what it is, now's the time people.