Is This Real Life?

A while back I read an article about how so many moms post on Instagram or blog pictures of their daily life or pics of their kids looking perfect and how it kind of makes everyone else feel they have to keep up. Like you have to pretend that your life is perfect to be happy.

Well, I'm here to say that my life is far from perfect and I'm still happy! I took a few pictures around my house to illustrate the point. You can judge me or think what you will, but I'm proud of my messy, imperfect life. And I'm happy because of it; not in spite of it. LIFE is a beautiful mixture of messy, ugly, insanely difficult things and some beautiful beyond description, joyful, can't stop laughing until you cry kind of things.

This is real life baby.


Real Life Picture #1: My Pantry. Finn can now grab things off the shelf, so what used to be a nicely organized clean pantry is now a mess because I have to put things too high for him to grab. Also it's messy because if I want to eat anything without him knowing and therefore begging for it, I have to sneak in the pantry in the dark and shovel in what I can before he finds me. I'm not joking.

Real Life Picture #2: Finger prints all over the mirror. Might I add, the mirror is for the wall but has remained on our floor propped against the wall for our ENTIRE THREE YEARS of marriage. Yep. I'm classy. At least my bed is made!

Real Life Picture #3: Laundry. Just when you think you've gotten it all under control, you blink and it turns into this. I'm not even sure why our laundry hamper is on top of a small table. 

And Finally . . . while trying to take a cute picture of Mason in his big boy clothes, Gideon also got these shots. Finn trying to steal his blankie back and my muffin top in all it's glory. Just to prove that you don't need a great body or a clean house to be a happy momma. I've got chubby belly and it's ok. Who wouldn't trade their six pack for those two little cuties?

Mason's Blessing Day

Had to throw this one in. Getting his beauty rest for his big day!

What a sweet day today. I kept finding myself choked up with emotion. Even now as I type I'm fighting back a few awkward tears. :)

We blessed our sweet baby boy today. Our SECOND baby boy. That was kind of surreal. Gideon was saying the blessing while I tried to pacify a screaming Finn. But somehow that made it all the more special. I know some people look at families with lots of young kids who are loud in church and leave the bench with a few crunched Cheerios and think "what a nuisance," but in my opinion there is something celestial about those sweet innocent little ones and parents just trying their best to do right by their kids. I felt that today. I know that this is absolutely the right path for us and the right way to do things for our family. I felt so happy and peaceful with my beautiful family that God has so graciously blessed me with. I don't think I've done a single thing to deserve such wonderful people in my life.

Part of those special people in my life are my husband's family. I love my own family as well and I feel so incredibly blessed to have gained a second family. Not everyone can say that about their in laws and I recognize what a special thing that is. We had everyone over for lunch afterwords and it was loud, crowded and ended in a mess. And I loved every single second of it. I would trash my house every day if it meant I got to spend more time with these people that are so close to my heart.

And in one final literary display of cheesiness and sentiment, I have to say how grateful I am for THE most special person in my life; Gideon. I was just overcome with happiness today and so much of that comes from him. He is so quick to drop whatever he's doing to help his stress case of a wife solve her problems. He is truly a kind, kind man. He works incredibly hard and gives so freely of himself. He loves our children more than perhaps any father ever has (I know you moms are all saying no way!), and his very existence gives me more happiness than I ever thought possible.

To sum it all up, it was a very good day. I am so very grateful.

Date Night

Friday night Jared and Lynn came down and babysat both of our boys, plus had their little girl (3 kids under 2), so we could go on a date, just the two of us. We can't thank them enough!! It was magical.

We kept it simple; a half off coupon for our favorite sushi place made for a good deal. While we waited for a table we strolled the river woods and we bought some bath and body works candles (after making poor Gideon help me pick a smell. How does it all smell the same to guys?). We window shopped at a few more shops as well. It was so nice to stroll hand in hand without the little ones crying or needing to be carried, etc. We were carefree and dare I say we giggled. . . We felt young again and it was so great. We finished the night with some yummy cupcakes and hot cocoa. And it's always fun to come home from a date to your kids sleeping peacefully and then have some fun hanging out with the babysitters! We love having our family so close and will be sad to leave in a year. Thanks again Jared and Lynn!

3 Months

Mason is three months old today. I really can't believe it's been 3 whole months. Where does time keep escaping to? Halloween is over and it's time for the holidays. Crazy! 

Our little Mason is getting way way too big. I pulled out some of Finn's old onezies for him today and found that he needs the 6+ months sizes. He's actually wearing a 9 month size right now and it fits pretty good. It's so funny because Finn was always too small for his "size" of clothes and Mason is too big. They are so different.

Mason is big enough to sit in the bumbo seat all by himself and does pretty good with his head. He is also becoming quite the social little boy! He is always so happy. All you have to do is look at him and he is all smiles. He is still sleeping through the night (at first I thought maybe it was a fluke). It's amazing. Last night he went to sleep at 9:30 and woke up to eat at 4:30, then went right back to sleep until 8. And every morning he wakes up smiling and cooing. It's so awesome. Finn didn't sleep that long until he was 9 months old! I am beginning to think that it will be possible to have more kids in the (distant) future. 

Finn is growing up so fast too. Someone tell my boys to stop growing!! Finn had such a hard time eating for a long time, but suddenly he eats almost everything (still has a hard time with slimy vegetables/fruits unless they're drenched in a tangy sauce like spaghetti or something garlicky). It's such a relief to put him in the highchair with food and HE EATS IN ON HIS OWN instead of it being a battle. At one point I was spending about 4 hours a day just feeding Finn. SO glad that stage is over. 

He has started talking like crazy. It's so cute. He can say a bunch of things, although they all are a little off, so only Gideon or I can understand them. Some of his words are baby-"bee bee," daddy, mommy, grandma -"ma ma," grandpa- "bom pa,"more -"mo," no no, dog, which is almost the same as blankie, ball- "baw,' and a few more. He says "dee dee" for blankie, which he is OBSESSED with. He has to have it while he eats, in the car, in the grocery store, etc. Lots of the time he just lays on the floor snuggling his "dee dee" and saying its name over and over, giggling. It's the cutest thing. He loves the corner fold of it and always finds it and sticks his finger in it. It's so adorable it kills me. Oh one more thing. Wherever we go, he waves bye bye to people (he can also say it). In Costco he just waves bye bye to the masses at the food court when we leave. Once a lady eating her pizza way in the back waved back at him. It was pretty funny. And he also thinks that every man older than 30 is a grandpa. He signs grandpa at people all the time and it's awkward because they think he's waving hi in a weird way. Then I have to explain that he's signing grandpa; I usually just say "you just look like my dad," which is a total lie 95% of the time. 

He is also obsessed with helping. I taught him how to say help, which is now "ha-pu." He hasn't quite figured out how to do a hard stop after the P sound. But now he loves to help me do everything and can say it, so I have to let him. It's really cute. He helps me mop, vacuum (holding onto it while I vacuum/mop), he helps me put the dishes away, put the clothes into the dryer, etc. He gets really mad if I put something away without letting him help. He even helps me when I dust-I just give him a clean rag and he goes to town wiping everything down. Oh and he also knows how to clean up his milk when he spills it. I just tell him to wipe it up and he grabs the towel and wipes it all up. It's so funny. Especially when he grabs Mason's dirty pants or something to clean it up. Classic. I think he needs a little toddler toy vacuum for christmas. 

These sweet boys are getting so big and I am so happy that I am home with them to watch them grow up every day. I love being a stay at home mom just as much as I thought I would. It's harder than I expected but way more fulfilling that I expected also. Having two kids has forced me to be more efficient with my time, and I am actually happier and more productive since I have gotten the hang of it. It's nice to always be busy. But you also enjoy the quiet time even more! I love my boys more than I can express and I couldn't be happier. 

Mason's one month photoshoot

These are just a few of the gorgeous pictures that my sister in law Lynn took of Mason at one month. They are so beautiful and I'm absolutely in love with them!

We sure love our little Mason. Finn can't stop kissing him and saying "bebee" and giving him his binkie.

He is such a happy boy; he almost always wakes up cooing and doing the biggest smiles. He is already so social. It's so fun seeing how different he and Finn are. They sure look like brothers though! Mason is just so content o be, and he is already sleeping through the night (like 8 hours through the night)!!

We sure are lucky to have this new little boy in our family. I don't know what we ever did without him.

We love you Mason!

Precious

I've been pondering lately about my role as a mother and how I don't want to take this part of my life for granted.

I've always been a goal oriented person. I had a job from the day I turned 16 until I had my first baby. It was an adjustment to not work outside the home or be in school and have a list of things getting checked off.

It has been so wonderful though. It has been a good adjustment; like if a 500 pound woman got lipo and suddenly had the body of a supermodel; it would take some getting used to a totally different body, but it would be a NICE thing to get used to.

That's how I feel about being a stay at home mom. It's the best thing I've ever done. It's also the hardest. It takes more mental and physical energy than anything else in the world. But the love and happiness that the work yields is exponentially more than anything else.

Sometimes I catch myself longing to go back to school or take a part time job. There is nothing wrong with doing either of these things, and I have no judgement for anyone who does both, as every single situation is different. But right now, that's just not in the works for me. And I'm ok with it. Largely because the reason I want to do all those things is to feel productive. I tend to forget that raising my beautiful little boys is plenty productive!!

I am very very lucky that we can get by without me working right now. Gideon makes that possible (with some extra help from our father in heaven) and for that I will always be grateful. I just want to focus on being there for my kids.

I want them to remember me playing blocks with them on the floor and chasing them up and down the halls, not remember how clean our house was or that everything was always so organized. I want to foster their imagination and self esteem. I want to teach them to love; both themselves and others. To be kind. I want to teach them that its ok to be different and how to use their imagination. How to stick to their principles and still be understanding of others'.

I guess the point of this post is just to say that I'm so very lucky and blessed. I know that. I don't want to ever take this beautiful little family and my life for granted. Sometimes it's hard, it's true. Sometimes I get overwhelmed. But at the end of the day, I get down on my knees and thank God for giving me the most precious gifts I could ever ask for. And I'm so immensely grateful.

Birth

I keep procrastinating posting about Mason's birth because it's kind of emotional to think about the whole process in detail. And by the time I have time at night to sit down and do it, I'm too exhausted from the day so I just don't post anything. DUMB!! I have the most beautiful pictures of this sweet boy's birth, and here they are. They tell the story alone, but I am just going to tell the simple story and keep all those emotions inside for another lengthier post.

MASON DEE MEDLEY

August 1, 2012, 10:33 p.m.

7lbs 10oz, 21in

I had been to the Dr. that morning to be checked, and I was a 4. So I took Finn to target, even though I had been having contractions all day. Man did I regret that! I saw Miriam in the store and tried to keep conversation going while having contractions. . . awkward. I barely made it home and by then I knew I couldn't handle Finn and these hefty contractions, so I decided to go pick up Gideon from school. By the time I got to BYU, I knew we should just head straight for the hospital. So, we dropped my first baby off at Miriam and Aaron's house to hang out with cousin Jade, and headed off to bring baby two into the world.


I was sure Gideon would be back within a few hours to pick up Finn. After all, Finn's labor was only about 4 hours long and that was my first! I figured this would be a quickie birth. Done and done. Boy was I wrong. Our experience this time was slow and peaceful, in contrast to the crazy whirlwind experience we had with Finn's birth. I progressed slowly and at first it was really nice. Gideon was so wonderful and supportive and was so helpful. We had a beautiful, bonding experience together and I loved it. My midwife was amazing; I've never felt so taken care of by someone not my husband or mom. Everything was fairly manageable (relatively speaking). I was talking and laughing between contractions, proud of myself at how well I was handling this. But by the time I'd been there for 5 hours and I had only progressed 3 1/2 centimeters, I was at my breaking point. I had mentally prepared for the pain; but I had planned on pain for maybe an hour or two. True to it's character, labor isn't ever what you think it will be, even the second time around. Mason had turned posterior, or "sunny side up," and I was in hell (posterior babies are supposed to be way way way more painful than a regular birth. Having experienced both, I'd agree whole heartedly with that). I was on the verge of yelling very horrific obscenities when everyone agreed it was a good idea to just get a spinal. I was 8 1/2 centimeters and thought I was going to die when the man of the hour showed up: the anesthesiologist. That man has got a one way ticket to heaven for SURE. I got the spinal and 10 minutes later, Mason was born. Because I went from an 81/2 to 10 in about 2 minutes, literally, my sweet boys heart rate dropped to about 50 and things got crazy. Everyone was freaking out and told me to just push as hard as I could because we had to get him out NOW (she later told me if it had taken just a few pushes longer they would have done an emergency cesarean). So lucky for me Mason was low to begin with, and I only had to push through two contractions before he was out.

He actually didn't need any extra help, in spite of what they thought he would need given the drop in his heart rate. He was healthy, beautiful, perfect, everything I wanted plus 50 bucks. :) My sweet baby boy was finally in my arms and I couldn't have been happier. The nurses all commented on his long feet, which is the same comment Finn got. Just like his big brother. He calmed right down for me, snuggled his tiny, warm body up to me and we fell in love then. Really truly. It was 10:33.

Thank you to my sister in law Miriam for shooting the birth, even though she was about 29 weeks pregnant herself! And to Jared and Lynn for the equipment and editing. What a great team I have. :)

breathing through contractions 

gideon held my hand like a champ

see? I wasn't lying about laughing between contractions

when things started getting rough

trying out the birthing ball

 holding on for dear life

there are no words. If you haven't had a baby, you can't judge this face.

and, stiiiil no progress. a little annoyed.

then wham! baby. so. fast.

hi sweet Mason! 

proudest daddy I know

We have been in heaven with this little boy ever since. He has been sleeping through the night for almost a month (as in 6-10 hours a night)!! I am very very lucky, this I know. Finn adores him and can't stop kissing him and saying "beebeeee." It's obvious to me that these two have a special connection. We've started catching Mason smiling up at his brother quite frequently. It's beautiful. I am more in love with my little family than ever before. We are so content and happy and feel so blessed. God is good.